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Since this is meant to be an unconventional whisky review blog, it has an unconventional rating system. In ascending order of awesomeness, the ratings and their so-called meanings:

“Not for me.” – I can appreciate why others like it, but I don’t care for it. Give me a bottle and I’ll likely mix drinks with it.

“Meh.” – This isn’t as bad as it sounds. I like it, I’ll drink it, but I won’t buy it. Although, if you give it to me as a gift, and I’ll drink it with a smile.

“Now that is a tasty beverage.” – It’s good, worth buying, but you can live without it… but why on Earth would you?

“Sweet baby Jesus that’s good!” – It’s simply something that belongs in your mouth and belly. You want it there again as soon as possible. Worth every penny spent.

“Fwoooooohhhhhhhh.” – When an onomatopeia of a lusty, breathless sigh is the only sound your throat can muster, it’s a small masterpiece of deliciousness. You have to imagine an orgasmic eye-roll and an overall loosening of every last muscle in the body going along with this sound.  Slumping back into your chair stuff. One of those rare whiskies I’ll tell my wife was on sale, so I feel less guilty buying it… again and again. It is, as the blog title suggests, pornographic.

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